The Best Joke I’ve Ever Written (according to my wife Taryn)

Here it is, the joke which forms the centerpiece of my marriage:

2018.8.14 identity oven.jpg(Please, hold your raucous applause.)

Oddly enough, this joke belongs to a micro-genre of “humor about failed transformations.”

For example, Taryn is also a big fan of this cartoon:

And back in the day, she was a staunch advocate of this video:

Help me out, folks. It’s her birthday next week. What are some other jokes playing on the concept of illogical or ill-conceived transformations?

9 thoughts on “The Best Joke I’ve Ever Written (according to my wife Taryn)

  1. I always liked this one: “The number you have reached is imaginary. Please rotate your phone -90 degrees and dial again.”

    (Worked better back in the day when phones still had rotary dials, but still.)

  2. Here we have the Bucher and the Beaver, two members of the Snark-hunting expedition. They’ve just heard th Jubjub-bird cry out once and then twice more, but they don’t know how much that amounts to. The Beaver is speaking:

    “Two added to one—if that could but be done,”
    It said, “with one’s fingers and thumbs!”
    Recollecting with tears how, in earlier years,
    It had taken no pains with its sums.

    “The thing can be done,” said the Butcher, “I think.
    The thing must be done, I am sure.
    The thing shall be done! Bring me paper and ink,
    The best there is time to procure.”

    The Beaver brought paper, portfolio, pens,
    And ink in unfailing supplies:
    While strange creepy creatures came out of their dens,
    And watched them with wondering eyes.

    So engrossed was the Butcher, he heeded them not,
    As he wrote with a pen in each hand,
    And explained all the while in a popular style
    Which the Beaver could well understand.

    “Taking Three as the subject to reason about—
    A convenient number to state—
    We add Seven, and Ten, and then multiply out
    By One Thousand diminished by Eight.

    “The result we proceed to divide, as you see,
    By Nine Hundred and Ninety and Two:
    Then subtract Seventeen, and the answer must be
    Exactly and perfectly true.

    “The method employed I would gladly explain,
    While I have it so clear in my head,
    If I had but the time and you had but the brain—
    But much yet remains to be said.”

    —Lewis Carroll, The Hunting of the Snark, “Fit the Fifth: The Beaver’s Lesson”

  3. I have a truly marvellous mathematical joke which this comments section is sadly too small to contain…

  4. It depends on what kind of joke you want to make.
    A simple classic one is giving her a mug that says “A donut”.
    Another joke is the mobius band joke or using the definition of rings apply it to an infinite group for the infinity rings. Or something as lame as the infinity rocks. I just realized that I’m bad at giving these kind of examples since I laugh at pretty much anything 😂😂😂

  5. (Approaches lectern.)

    Today’s class is about recursion. However, before you can understand recursion, you must first understand recursion.

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